Yesterday, the BK, LG and I, all decided to take a trip to the DMV to get Oregon Driver's licenses. Risky? Definitely, but we left early enough and figured we would leave if the lines were too hairy and brought lots of food to keep the LG quiet. We are both required to take a "knowledge test" before we can get the licenses, and due to my laziness over the years, I have 3 different names listed on my passport, SS card, and Driver's license. It's complicated, and the line turned out to be the least of our worries. We laughed our way through the line by reading the "study" manual, from which I have taken a few of the following excerpts:
1 - Drinking Myth #1 - "I drive better after a few drinks." Okay, come on, is this really even a myth, would anyone who is sober really give this as an argument?
3 - Drinking Myth #2 - "I don't mind riding with Joe after he's been drinking. He can really hold his liquor". If you ask me, you should send this guy home with Joe and just hope that they only remove themselves from the gene pool.
3 - "The importance of vision to driving is obvious." Apparently not so obvious that they couldn't leave this out.
4 - Hood Flies Up - Brake smoothly ease onto the shoulder, and stop. Thanks.
5 - "Although drivers must yield to pedestrians in crosswalks, pedestrians must not suddenly leave a curb or other safe waiting place and walk into the path of a vehicle....Vehicles cannot stop instantly."
6 - "You may pass on the right only when there is room ahead on the road." You mean to tell me that if there is a semitrailer in the right lane, I can't drive underneath. Come on. That totally has to be legal.
You might be thinking that this is a knowledge test for dummies, which, it may be, but I should also share at this point that the BK failed the test and he is no dummy. I, was unable to take the test at all (thus spared the humiliation that would likely have ensued), as (surprise, surprise) I hadn't brought along enough verification to prove that my hodgepodge of alternate identities were actually me.
So, let's be honest, how many of you drivers out there would answer the following correctly:
1 - When stopped at a red light on a two-lane road, it is legal to: A) turn right after coming to a complete stop; B) turn left onto a one-way road after coming to a complete stop; C) Proceed through the intersection after coming to a complete stop and checking for traffic; D) A & B; or E) All of the above. The answer is D. Yes, in Oregon, it is apparently legal to make a left turn onto a one way street, even through oncoming traffic.
2 - A Class C driver's license allows you to drive the following vehicles in the State of Oregon: A) Passenger vehicles including cars, trucks and recreational vehicles for personal use; B) Passenger vehicles, recreational vehicles and fire or emergency vehicles; C) Passenger vehicles and motorcycles; D) School buses. The answer is B. I've always wanted to drive a fire truck. Here's my chance.
I don't want to get into the rest (since there are probably quite a few others), but it was humbling, and sort of amusing that after being there for an hour (not bad), all we (two grown adults with Master's degrees) walked out of there with was a lighter wallet ($5 for the BK to take the test). I guess we are just lucky they didn't revoke our Virginia licenses on the spot and call us a cab.
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One woman keeping herself as sane as possible on the crazy train.
9 comments:
Okay, sorry we didn't warn you, but that test is NOTORIOUS. People fail it all the time.
There is a practice test on the Oregon DMV website so that you can figure out what type of moron-itude they expect out of you before hand.
Maybe if you came to the MDV drunk, you might really think that you drive better after a few drinks.
If someone who didn't know you found this post, they would probably think you are a former spy or something very secretive because of your three different names. Virginia drivers license.....hmmm.
Hey, speak for yourself. I got 100%on the first try. And that's the truth.
If you're lucky, I'll let you know my secret.
Oh, seriously I am sorry. Gotta love the DMV hey? Although the last time I went to renew my license they typed in my weight wrong making me about 20 pounds lighter. Now THAT was a good day at the DMV :)
I loved when I got to take the Utah test with my parents...open book and I got the best score! Mom and Dad missed 2 :) I guess there are good things about being a teenager - the driving test was fresh in my memory.
I was just thinking that I need to make a trip to the DMV to get an Oregon driver's license so I can register to vote (I think the deadline is tomorrow). I know, I've been here for almost a year and I still have my CA driver's license...what can I say? I really like my picture! I have been pleasantly surprised by the ease with which I have been able to move through every DMV since living in Virginia. VA DMV is HELL, literally. There is no worse place on earth, or below it. It took me 6 trips to finally get a driver's license there. Infuriating. Here's hoping you'll only have to make one more :)
Hey Jen,
If you think about it, if it is a one way street there is no oncoming traffic. So if you are stopped at an intersection and the one way street flows to the left you may turn left on a red light with traffic. Although you can't turn right on that same street under any circumstance. Although I would say that this probably would not make sense unless I did it on a daily basis.
matt,
actually, in this scenario there is oncoming traffic. The street perpendicular is one way, but parallel to you is a lane of oncoming traffic. I get that the oncoming traffic also has a red light, but it still seems like a bad idea.
Poor John, how humiliating. I know how he feels, as I failed the first time too. It is incredibly stupid that you even have to take the knowledge test since you already have a license from another state. Good luck next time!
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